close calls and blue balls (with a secret at the end)

 Close calls

I was going to enter the left lane, moving over to avoid a guy that kept stalling his souped up four cylinder stick shift car.  A quick glance in the mirror showed a black car exiting my lane and coming up fast, I stayed where I was and let him pass me then eased in behind him.

That's when the spider sense tingled.

He was moving to fast, pulling up quickly behind a slower moving car.  His brake lights glowed a angry red...I cursed and hit the brakes, the front wheel locked and the back end rose up ever so slightly...I let go of the front brake out of reflex smelling the burnt rubber of a burning brake.

The bike still moved forward and I pressed down on the front brake again as I came to an emergency stop.

I didn't panic.  I didn't curse...I didn't even think it was that scary at the time.   The event was so quick, so quick that I didn't think...I simply acted.

I didn't even think about it till afterword.   Replaying the event in my mind,  I had to smile, I was safe and the bike did not go down.  There was no accident.   Then I kicked myself for putting myself into what was a stupid situation to begin with.    I should have had a better situational awareness of the traffic around me.  I should have realized that if I was frustrated their were bound to be others being pissy as well.

The traffic was stop and go the whole day...what made me think the other lane would be open?   Why was I in such a hurry? 

Instead I was to worried about getting around a single car that was holding me back.

"Cocky," I used to say, "would get me killed."   Somehow I had violated the unwritten first rule of my motorcycle riding.  It's time I started to repeat that mantra.

And Blue Balls 

 I hate to use a off color phrase for male sexual frustration, but honestly I like the way it sounded with "close calls".  

In Florida this time of year we have pop up showers that can hit us any time of the day.  I rode into work the last two days.  Each time worried about the weather and each day the sky opened up so badly that that certain streets in the Tampa area flooded.  

I left work shortly after 8 PM both nights, I turn north, looking at darkening skies and feeling a bit worried about what I would be driving into.   I was not gone 5 minutes before I drove into the rain, it was a strong storm, and I started to count the time between lightening flashes...One Mississippi...two Mississ....crap.

That storm was moving quicker than I was and I started to seriously consider pulling over to put on my rain gear, or maybe just wait out the storm.   Then the skies opened up and I went from having a few drops on my helmet to soaked in a matter of moments.  

"No use putting on the rain gear now." I thought.  I drove gingerly though the storm for another 5 or 10 minutes....then that was it.  I was out. 

That's the frustration.   Do I pull over, dress in my rain gear and hope that I will continue to be rained on?  Or do I ride, wet, all the way home?

How many times have I driven in my frog toggs sweating my ass off?  

Summer in Florida is full of those pop up showers...riding in the rain is just part of the experience, although it can be a little frustrating at times.

(and my secret)

I'm thinking about becoming Batman.

   

Of course...

So how exactly did I allow this to happen?

Kimmie is slipping out from under me.  I can feel it.  I know now that I entered the turn a little fast and I'm leaning hard to get her to make the turn.  It's raining too, one of Florida's famous and brief pop up showers but it's enough to make the road a little slick.  My rain gear, of course, is at home.

Of course I had to stay late and choose to be adventurous, taking a road that I don't really know full of turns, deer and darkness.

I didn't go down.

I'm upright and in control.   I thanked a God I'm now sure exists.  Somehow...I did everything right.  I slow down to a much more manageable speed, I don't need to go through that again.

Of course, the second I slow down I've some asshole who's insisting on tailgating me.  Of course his bright lights are on.  I'm not in the mood for this crap and when he passes me, on the double yellow, I've a few choice words for him.  

I just want to get home.

I have to remind myself not to have a death grip on the handlebars.  I have to remind myself not to get fixated on any particular target.  All that training from a beginner's motorcycle class long ago starts to fill my head.  For the first time in a long time I'm miserable on the bike.

A family of small deer wander out into the road and I apply the brakes quickly, they look at me with alien eyes and move back into the woods.  I move on.

A few minutes later I come across the remains of a deer in the middle of the road and don't have a choice but to enter the other lane to avoid it.  The car behind me hits the carcass with a crunch and the slamming of brakes.

I just want to get home.  Kimmie can get me home.

I'm the only vehicle on this road now.  It's rural and there seems to be no moon or homes about.  The trees that would look like a leafy tunnel in the day now take on a more sinister view, as the branches becoming skinny arms meant to snatch the loan weary traveler.

Finally I'm near home, back on the streets I know.  I start to relax, and quickly fall into muscle memory as I lean and move around the turns that I have ridden 1001 times before.

Of course, a possum or some other strange nocturnal animal decides to commit suicide by running in front of my bike.  I, of course, hit it.

Somehow I stayed up.   Somehow Kimmie saved me.

Somehow Kimmie gets me home.

I go have a drink...

Back from the wilds

This is actually just an update.

I made it back from the wilds of Penns Woods without much wear and tear.  Before I left, I was informed that upon my return I would be trained as a First Responder.  Considering what I do, I figured this would be more geared to working with Police and 911.

Boy!  Was I ever wrong.

This is a Medical First Responder training.  This is for accidents, serious injuries and worst case scenario type stuff.  Which, again considering what I do for a living, may not be a bad idea.  It's not your basic first aid training (which I had years ago during one day and promptly forgot).  This is advanced stuff, and requires a lot of study on my part (It's actually a 48 hour course being done in 1 work week).

Not me, but yes I ended up on the backboard eventually

It's something that I think I can do.  I have a solid background in Biology and Science.  I also have a kind heart...and am not sure if I am strong enough to keep calm and cool and focused when all hell is breaking loose about me.  Hopefully, I will never have to use any of this.

If something does happen, if something does go badly wrong it will be good to know that I have that training.  That knowledge.  Now I'm thinking more than ever that I need to find out where and when the next Road Guardian class will be held.

So give me a week.  I need to concentrate on that and work on getting my life in some sort of order.  I'll be back and tell you all about my trip to Pittsburgh and everything else.  Just give me some time...there is some good stuff happening in May.  Some good news on the horizon.

Road Guardians - Anyone interested in taking a class?

Somewhere, somehow I came across a review of the Road Guardians safety class.  I put out some feelers and am now thinking of actually hosting a class at the community clubhouse where I live.  Basically the Road Guardian class is designed to provide basic accident scene emergency training that is motorcycle specific.  It is not a first aid or first responder class, but a class designed to assist EMS and the police in case of a motorcycle accident.

I was surprised to learn for example that when trauma results in the use of CPR there is only a 1% chance of survival and that many EMS technicians may not know how to properly remove a bikers safety gear (such as chaps).  Or at least this is what is reported on the website.

At this point in my life I mostly ride alone.  That may change in the future, and I do see a lot of bikers and scooters on the road.  I also know that eventually I will see an accident because frankly I see a lot of idiots on bikes...to many.  Being able to help in some way  in case of an accident appeals to me.  In 2007 for example, motorcyclists accounted for 13% of all traffic fatalities.  That's a ridiculous number.

This class is a one day program and I should stress it's not going to give anyone CPR or first aid certification.  If I feel there is enough interest in it, I may looking into bringing in a CPR/First aid trainer as well.  I live one hour from Tampa, one hour from St. Pete and one hour from Orlando.  So I'm centrally located and have access to a building that could be used to hold a class.

So I am going to put feelers out.  Starting with the St. Pete Scooter Club and the Orlando Scooter Society.  I figured a few other forums I belong to might spread the word as well.  If there is enough interest then I'll look into it a little further.  No harm in that is there?

Random thoughts and images.

June 1st is the official start to the Rainy Season in Florida.  We need the rain badly, as the lakes are below their normal levels and countless turtles take their lives in their own hands to find a patch of mud on the other side of the blacktop.  As much as we need the rain, as much as I want my veggie garden to thrive...I am weary of the rain as well.

I ride to work every day and if I didn't have my paper route to do two days out of the week I get the feeling that my car would sit for weeks without moving.  I don't necessarily see this as a bad thing.  I am planning on replacing one of my two cars eventually and using the bike full time anyhow.   The problem is that my experience riding in rain is limited.  Over the past two years or so that I've been riding some sort of scooter I can count the number of times I've ridden in the rain on one hand.  One of the first things I bought when I got the Burgie was a good rain suit.  It sits under the seat in it's pack...waiting.  I have a 50% chance of getting wet tonight, a 70% chance tomorrow.

June 18, 2012 is also National Ride to Work Day.  I'm always amazed that there are 3 or 4 other motorcycles at work, that I know of, and yet my old Scooter is always parked there.  I do understand that there may be reasons why someone can not ride to work.  I also understand that their are other alternatives - for example when I lived in Pittsburgh I rode the bus every day despite that fact that I could have driven in and parked for free.  It was just easier to ride the bus.  A girl at work owns a Prius and a Harley, yet the Prius gets better gas mileage than the hog...so yea, I get it.  However it seems to me that if you own a bike, you should ride it.  Not just on the weekends or from Tavern to Tavern but to work and to school and to the grocery store.

For example, the other day I was in Tampa on business and driving past an ancient woman riding a Peace scooter.  Her toothless smile was so wide that you could get lost in it.  She had a look of pure, simple, childish joy on her face.  I could not help it and yelled out "YOU GO GRANDMA!" and got the biker wave in return.  Some images you have burned into your brain and have to acknowledge them.   I know that years from now I'll be riding somewhere with that same grin and sense of childlike wonder, I only hope that someone see's me and that I impress them as much as she did me.


That is one of the reasons I write.  To share these impressions and images with others.  One of the other reasons I write is to hopefully teach someone else something...anything really.  What not to do, what to do.  To just get them to think about something differently for a moment or two.  One blog that does a fantastic job of that is "How to ride your scooter safely."   If your riding any sort of two wheeled vehicle this is required reading.  


Finally, if your not familiar with a site called Fuelly, you should be.  It's designed to give you hard figures on your fuel consumption as well as tips on how to increase it.  It's not hard to use and it should be interesting to see how my car's and bike compares to others over time.

The van

You never know what is going to happen when you ride.  You can prepare, you can anticapate and do your best not to put yourself into a bad position.

I was coming up to the red light, already starting to slow when the mini van cut right out in front of me. 

I didn't even have to think.  Brakes on, turned the bike sidways and looked for a way out.   There was none. 

I didn't hit the van, I didn't put the bike down.   I did look at the driver with a "WTF???" face long and hard.

Thank you motorcycle safety course. 

Thinking of buying a scooter? Want advice?

May 1, 2014 - UPDATE:  A lot of you are looking for information on Scooters.  A few of you may even buy one, so I'm going to recommend you read not only my article but also this piece on Cheapskate Scooters.  You want to buy the bike that's best for you, but also one that is best for your situation.

I write this blog because I am still new to the joy and the art of motorcycling.  I have questions and concerns and hopefully someone just as new or newer than me stumbles across my pitiful attempt at being helpful.  If they gain some new knowledge or somehow avoid making a mistake that I made then wonderful.  


So with gas getting close to and, as your reading this, probably over $4 a gallon I thought it best to give a little run down on what to look for if your thinking about life on two wheels.  I’m not going to say Brand X is better than Brand Y, that’s not my job nor the purpose of this entry.


Basically, if you were to come up to me on the street and ask me for advice on buying a scooter my answer might surprise you.


1)         Do not buy a scooter based on gas mileage alone.

Buddy's all in a row.

Okay, so you want to get somewhere between 50 - 100 miles per gallon.  You want to save money -  I understand that.  But do a little research first.  For example, what is the speed limit on the majority of roads you drive on?  Is that speed limit more wishful thinking or is it accurate?  If you’re driving a little 50CC over 50 miles round trip down the highway with cars zipping past you at 75 miles per hour…it may be time to reconsider your choice of scoot.


That being said, buy a motorcycle or scooter based on what you want to do.  Don't buy something that is to powerful for you either.  You don't need 1200cc between your legs to make you a man if your not comfortable with that type of power.

What do you plan to use your Scooter for?  Commuting?  Touring?  Errands?  I was very surprised to find that, over time, my riding needs changed.  I started as a simple commuter, and now I would rather take the bike out than the car.  Your mileage may vary.

2)         Get endorsed and Gear Up

To make it as simple as possible, this might save your life.  The endorsement class will also break you of some bad habit and teach you to be a better, and safer, rider.  Well motorcycles and scoots are great fun and a form of cheap transportation the truth is that jackets, helmets and other things are not.  A good “cheap” armored jacket might run you $125.  A really good helmet about the same.  Gloves vary in price and frankly I'm not sure why.  Find a pair that fit and your comfortable with.  Boots can be found cheaply (for example I got mine at Wal-mart), just make sure they are waterproof and have oil resistant soles.


These are a one time expense.  Wear them all the time.  Hence the term "ATGATT" which stands for All The Gear, All The Time.


Scooters and motorcycles are dangerous, have a lower profile than your car and don't react like a car does.  Preparing for that moment when something goes wrong, and it will go wrong, just makes common sense.

3)         Are you a gearhead?

I’m not a gear head but I learned a few things because motorcycles and scooters can be expensive to work on.  For example an oil change in your car can be done by your local mechanic for roughly $20 US dollars.  An oil change on your bike might be twice that.
You can go through life not ever learning how to do something, learning to change the oil and other basic maintenance is just part of owning a bike and might save you some money.  Motorcycles and scooters are not that common (yet) and frankly your local mechanic may not be qualified to work on your ride despite the fact he's worked on your car for 20 years.  Learning how to do basic maintenance is a requirement of owning a bike.  If your not willing to do that consider public transportation.  


4)  Are you willing to suffer?


You will be hot.  You will be cold.  You will be wet.  You are exposed to the environment and have to make a choice to accept that.  


5)  Are you willing to have a smile on your face for the rest of your days?


Because you will.  


If your willing to take some advice, then I think your going to not only save money but have a hell of a good time doing it.  

The return of the shade tree mechanic

Growing up in the 70's and early to mid 80's when my Dad had a problem with his car he took it down the road to a guy named Dan.  Dan worked out of a barn in the back of his house, or on a warm spring or summer day, under a big old oak tree my brother and I loved to climb.  He was literally a shade tree mechanic right down to the ever present bottle of beer.

I am not mechanically inclined.  It's not that I don't understand the principles of it, the weird thing is that in my life I've been a lab rat.  I worked for years as a civil engineering tech and now work for a GPS company.   I understand tech.  I speak tech.

Just don't ask me to actually fix or repair anything.  I find humor in the fact that I know more about how the road under my wheels is constructed than the machine I'm riding on it.

When I bought my scooter I knew that had to change.  I've done minor repairs in the car, "How difficult could it be to change the oil?" I thought.    Well truthfully in the Burgman, not hard at all.   Although I did quickly learn that some things I would have to do in the future were going to require more than a Phillips head screwdriver and a wrench.

The oil change itself was pretty simple and my thanks go out to Gary for walking me through it the first time, although after watching him do it I think I could have handled it.

He also pulled apart the CVT which started me thinking how little about the machine I decided to ride.  If there is a squeal I know I can sit and think about it and identify where it's coming from...even be pretty sure what's causing it.   Fixing it...not so sure and mechanics love to see a rube like me coming!

I understand the physics of it...the principles of my bike.  I know that if I take the time and invest the energy I'll be able to fix the minor problems, change the oil and even seek shade under that old tree.  If I invest the time and energy.

OK, maybe not the shade tree mechanic I had in mind

What modern car dealers don't want to tell you is that, Dan - remember him - does not actually exist.  Things today are all electronic do dads and whatit's.  The mechanic today is more of a computer diagnostics person than the proverbial grease monkey.  Watching people work on their bikes harks back to a simpler time.

Their is an amazing community of "gearheads" out there.  When a strange black streak appeared on my variator the first thing that popped into my mind was that the belt was not seated properly and rubbing against the metal.   That could either result in a broken belt or replacing the variator itself.

As it so happened that mark appears to be a normal thing, as Gary posted the pics and question to the Burgman USA forums and had an answer within a few hours.  So I feel pretty confidant moving forward that if I have a issue or question I can get the answer.  I feel that I can work on this bike, or at least ask the right questions if I do take it to a mechanic.

Getting it legal....

When I was just a wee lad growing up in the suburbs of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania I didn't know anyone that rode.  In fact, it wouldn't be till I moved to Charlotte, North Carolina right out of University that I even knew anyone that owned a bike.

As I grew older my circle of friends grew to include bikers, many of whom were serious about their Harley's, BMW's and one guy I knew even collected Indian's.  Hell, even my ex wife rode!  Yet I still did not understand what the big deal was.

My reasons for getting the scooter I did were more economical than anything but I know understand why they would take off for a weekend and just ride with no particular destination in mind.  In a way I'm sorry I didn't "get it" before.  So when I decided to upgrade from a little 125cc to the bigger 400cc Burgman I knew I would get my endorsement.

In Florida you can either get your motorcycle  endorsement on a 150cc scooters or on a 250cc  motorcycle licence.  The licence will allow you to ride either.   I decided to take the class on the motorcycle, after all you never know when you might move up right?  For someone like me who has never really ridden before it was an eye opener of sorts.  Where I thought the scooter was challenging enough learning how to work the controls of a motorcycle were a whole new challenge.

We also had to learn it in the pouring rain and howling wind over a short two day period, not the ideal condition's but I was looking at it this way; if I did well now...I know I could it in better conditions.  A opinion that seemed to be shared by my fellow trainees.

So after a few mistakes and a few realizations that "Yes, I've been doing this wrong!" I worked hard on correcting those mistakes.  Breaking habits that I somehow picked up - like covering the front brake handle with my hand.  While I'm not happy with my final score (I am my own worst critic) I can say that I did OK.

So I have the insurance, the licence, the experience will come with every mile under my wheel.  I'm part of the brotherhood now, for better or worse.  I took the class through the Motorcycle Safety Foundation and highly recommend it to anyone thinking about riding, or who has ridden illegally for a while.